“It’s a long one.”
Said the actress to the Bishop
Photo: ShearerM4
I rushed into Teach My Children Well for all the right reasons. Looking back on that decision now I don’t have a single regret. It’s possibly the best thing I’ve done for myself for a long time.
I’m still excited about it like some giddy puppy dog mauling a squeaky toy.
I’ve been blogging barely six weeks now and already it’s thrown up some interesting challenges, an open-ended workload and it’s introduced me to lots of great new people. Plus it’s been tremendous fun.
I’m in this for the long haul. I love it. But before I go any further you need to know some things.
I’m going to set my stall out and tell you what I’m about, why I’m doing this and what you can expect from me.
Me
I’m an intensely private person. I always have been. I’m not passionate about the lime-light and I’m not seeking fame.
I like peace and quiet.
When I’ve been in the company of others, I’ve rarely felt the need to break the sound of a perfectly golden silence with the rumblings of my belly as they escape through my open mouth in the form of pointless chit chat - although I am prepared to sabotage that divine moment if the silence is too awkward - and then… I’ll let out an almighty belch.
Charming aren’t I? Hahaha 
My family and my children will be my legacy. I love them all very much and take great delight from being with each one of my four children. Nothing they do can stop me loving them.
I want to teach my children well. I want to set a good example and I want to be a positive role model. Does this sound familier yet? I hope so. It’s the message I want to live by.
When the time is right, and they leave to go their own way, I want them to leave as balanced, educated, loving, caring, aspirational individuals (and I don’t believe these to be mutually exclusive traits).
My home is my castle.
Home is where I escape the world until I’m ready to venture back out. I know it sounds contradictory but I am a sociable creature but usually only on my own terms. I love people and the company of others but I love my own company just as much, if not more.
I use self-deprecating humour quite a bit, but it doesn’t undermine my self-confidence even at an unconscious level (although Tim Brownson (who is a wise man) might well disagree because he likes me to mind my language – and I’ll come back to this point later).
Being able to laugh at myself is important to me. It helps me grow because it forces me to acknowledge the things I laugh at. More importantly the self-deprecating humour stops me self-destructing. It helps to keep me sane.
The same goes for humour at my expense. I think it’s fantastic, really fantastic as long as I’m in on the joke. If I’m being laughed at rather than with I can be a nasty and vindictive bastard. I can. It’s true. I know you don’t believe me because I’ve got such an innocent face.
It also helps if whoever is teasing me can take a joke in return. If you can’t take it, don’t dish it out! That’s a great rule isn’t it? I love that one.
Seriously though, I love humour. It’s a big part of my life.
I think inappropriate humour can be very funny for the right audience, at the right time.
I find inappropriate humour extremely funny when it’s clever and the timing is perfect. I know that some people can’t do this, but I’m able to suspend reality long enough to appreciate the joke. I know it’s not real. I know it’s not personal. It’s just a joke. I mean, you can still love your Mother-in-Law and enjoy a ‘My mother in law joke’. Of course you can.
I have great love for sarcasm too (even though it’s the lowest form of wit) - and I find irony to sweet. SO SWEET.
If you have a dry sense of humour I’ll probably be drawn to you like footware to a dog turd – and you’ll be stuck with me in the tread pattern until you clean me out. Sorry, but you can never quite get rid of the smell. Haha!
I can also be deadly serious too. I don’t fool it up all the time and I’m more than capable of holding a sensible conversation.
I was painfully shy as a child and as a teenager. I’m still shy if the truth be told but I control it now, much more than it controls me.
Basically, for all the good things I am, I’m flawed and I’m conflicted, but isn’t everyone?
Teach My Children Well Dot Com
This is not so much about being a stay at home daddy blog although that is the context in which it’s set. It’s more about self-improvement as it relates to the context.
This is not about beating myself up or running myself down. It’s not about seeking pity or sympathy. It’s about being honest with myself and reaching out to others who can help me develop as a person and as a parent.
It’s also about me reaching out to those who may want my help. I made a career of helping others and there’s no reason why I should stop helping now just because I’ve changed roles.
I’m fortunate in that I was born with a great big dollop of common sense, so whilst I don’t consider myself an expert in the field of ‘helping others’ I can usually work my way to a decent solution backed up by 40 years on the planet and seven years of parenting.
Having said all this, I see no reason why I can’t do the daddy blogger thing and witter on about whatever the hell takes my fancy from time to time. And I will. Oh yes!
I’m going to write to this blog as often as I can but with my other commitments it will be limited to a maximum of three times a week. I’ll post every Monday - and in that post I’ll let you know what’s in store for the rest of the week.
The next bit is important
When I write and speak I’m aware that positive language (as mentioned above) is important and this is especially true of self-talk, but at the moment I haven’t perfected it.
When I write I want to convey to you the way I feel in a given moment. It doesn’t mean that I feel that way all the time. It just means that’s how I felt when I experienced it or wrote about it. I believe that writing in this way will be less contrived and easier to relate to.
You must understand that in taking this approach I’m not moaning, and I’m not complaining, I’m just exploring my thoughts.
Mostly my thoughts are very positive, but the nature of self-development means looking at some negative issues.
The positive language will filter in as it starts to become a genuine part of my make up. I’m determined to get the hang of it if just for the sake of my children.
I’ll also write about things that delight or amuse me and I hope you’ll see a rich vein of light-heartedness running through this blog.
My style
Throughout my life I’ve always played the arbitrator or conciliator. I’m able to hear two wildly opposing views and see good in each of them.
I have opinions but I’m not entrenched in them. Usually I keep an open mind and I’m often ready to change my mind, but this doesn’t make me a spineless fence sitter. I have my model of the world and I’m happy to defend but if I’m shown a better option I’ll take it.
I’m not actually that good at expressing myself, particularly under pressure, so I seek to find meaning through conversation. I’ve come unstuck with this professionally as my attempts to understand and be understood have been seen as aggressive and challenging. I certainly can be those things, but it’s rarely my starting point.
What I’m saying is that I’m willing to listen to your opinion and won’t seek to blow it out of the water if it differs from my point of view. I want honest feedback, preferably constructive.
Talk to me… and I’ll talk back.
What other motives do I have?
Well, you should know that I’m also trying to supplement my living. I mean, why hide it?
If I can make money through my online presence then I’m going to do it. Why deny myself the possibility?
I don’t mean to sound mercenary but we’ve dropped a wage, it’s a bit tough at the moment (as for many other families) and anything I can do to bring money in to the home has to be considered.
It’s sometimes hard to convince my family that my internet antics are going to benefit us all, when all they see is me sitting at a computer for hours on end.
I’ll write more about this soon.
So there you have it
I hope you feel you know me a little bit better now. I certainly feel better for blurting all this out.
I haven’t got a question for you today so feel free to poke fun at me in the comments or ask me a question.
I’ll post again on Friday.
Thanks for reading.
Dave
{ 0 comments… add one now }