It looks like everyone else got one, but Santa didn’t leave a Wii under our Christmas tree.
Nor is the tight fisted Git ever likely to.
Picture: mdmags
If I could lay my hands on the work-shy old codger I’d punch him in the beard and shave a four letter word into Rudolf’s fur.
Fair’s fair though, I didn’t actually ask Santa for a Wii but I’m busting for one now.
Trouble is, my wife has an aversion to such things and I can understand why – they’re such a time waster.
Acknowledging that fact doesn’t really help me because I’d still like to have a Wii in every room of the house.
I guess I’m destined only to play with someone else’s Wii until my wife kicks me out of the marital home and I’m all alone in my dingy God forsaken stank hole of a bedsit with nothing else to do other than play with myWii.
Ah, when I look at it that way…. I’ll gladly go without a Wii every single Christmas.
It’s not the only sacrifice I’ve made for my family – generous soul that I am….
I’ve been offline for a whole week.
It’s been brilliant!
I’ve spent the time performing a very good approximation of a decent husband and father.
And although I say so myself, I haven’t done a bad job.
My absence from my digital life was quite deliberate.
I had every intention of abandoning my pursuit of future glories in favour of spending time with the people I love, and it was worth it.
My home has been a sea of smiling faces and cordial conversation – apart from brief moments of frustration and temper brought on by overly complicated toys.
I’ve already transformed one Transformer into a pile of spare parts, and I have no remorse. I’ve even named him in true Transformer style. He’s called ‘Junk Yard‘. Hahahaha.
I laughed long and hard about that, but my boys assured me it was the least funny thing they’d ever heard.
My genius is wasted on them.
Anyway, it feels like I’ve had a holiday.
I feel refreshed and invigorated.
I feel ready to tackle the New Year.
Thank you for sticking with me during 2008.
You’ve been very supportive and great fun!
I wish you all the very best for 2009.
Dave
{ 11 comments… read them below or add one }
Dave!
I almost spit up my coffee all over the keyboard – when I read your title and saw the picture – you should have a warning or something for people!! This is seriously the funniest thing I’ve seen recently – what a great way to start my day (well it is since I didn’t spew coffee everywhere…had that happened, it wouldn’t have been quite so great)!
Good to hear you had some time away – putting together Christmas toys! I always wonder why I have extra parts left over…
Dave, it’s been great being here – and going along for the ride here on your site. You’re a welcome voice, always – and your hum0r shines through here beautifully. I’m looking forward to the new year and what it holds, and I’ll be here, as well, as you continue forward, whatever direction you go in. You’re awesome, my friend!! Happy New Year!
So I’m not the only one who’s broken a transformer and traumatized a child?
(Notes from the Dark Side. Read only if you dare.) Dave whisper, “Wii Fit has Yoga” in you wife’s ear and walk away nonchalantly. It may help win her over.
Have a great new year Dave!
Hi, Dave! Your holiday worked wonders for you; you’re sounding like your old self! Hm… Wii or wife? Smart man! Have a wonderful New Year’s celebration, too, Dave. While you’re planning new year’s things, please focus on whatyou want, not on what blogging experts tell us we must do, like posting schedules. If that doesn’t work for you, just don’t shoulder that pressure. Blog when you want, what you want. I’ll always be here, happily anticipating!
Luv you! ~ Julie
I was just like your wife Dave.
There will be NO computer games in this house turning our children into zombies who would rather sit in front of the TV on their own all day then go walking in the woods, I’d chant.
But I have to say, it has been one of the best buys we’ve made and has brought some of the errant parts of this family together.
We ‘went’ bowling this morning and then spent the afternoon in the frosty fields behind the house.
My sister-in-law played tennis with her teenage son (who barely grunts at her these days) and they were laughing and joking together.
It is a big expense and we gave up presents ourselves and cut right back on the children’s gifts and asked Santa very nicely, pointing out that the whole family had been very very good this year!
Anyway, you don’t need a machine to go wiiing in every room of the house Dave . . .
And this little piggy went wii, wii, wii… all the way home
Very funny Dave. I appreciate your humour. All the best to you in 2009.
If you ever do happen to get a Wii and your wife is disapproving, you’ll always find my home a happy recipient of your marital misfortune
I’m just kidding. I think my wife likes the little time we have together as it is, and a Wii would only… wii on the situation, if you know what I mean.
Lance,
Thanks! I’m glad I didn’t drown your keyboard in coffee.
Ride along my friend, you’re always welcome.
Avlor,
I’m not sure? I think suggesting my wife puts her feet behind her ears might draw a violent response. That is what yoga is all about isn’t it?
Julie,
I really do feel brighter for my break. I should resolve to do this more often.
I think you’re right Julie, I’ll just do what feels right and hope that I don’t get arrested. Luv you too Julie!!!!
Tara,
It was your post that inspired my post. I loved reading about how the thing brought the family together.
I can’t see my wife ever consenting to having anything remotely resembling a games machine in the house. She threatens to smash my computer to pieces if she finds me playing solitaire!! (Ok, so that’s a lie).
I’ll work on it. On the bright side, by the time I’m allowed to have one, they’ll be capable of teleporting people! *grin*
Davina,
LMAO. How very appropriate!! I love it!
Ryan,
The only way I’ll get a Wii is if I sneak one into the house. I’d have to get up at night while everyone else is asleep just to play on it. Oh wait. That might work!!
Do you think they have dancing lessons on the Wii? That might be a good way to introduce the idea of spending quality time Wiiing together??
Dave, I never thought about dancing lessons. I’ve tried the angles of “but it’s family friendly fun!” and “it’s the least expensive of the gaming consoles” neither of which have yielded results. I’m not sure about the reality of dancing lessons, but my desperation may have moved me into the realm of downright dishonesty.
Ryan, let’s make a deal. Whichever of us is successful in acquiring a Wii, must share the secret with the other!
LMAO I didn’t wish for a Wii either but am defo saving for one now after spending an afternoon playing with another couple.. erm I mean playing the Wii at a friends house (much better). We had a blast and now are completely jealous of friends and family that get out their controllers and pop them into guitars, raquets, steering wheels, etc.. If you want I’ll hold Rudolph while you shave him..lol Great Post!
Kirst´s last blog post..A New Year, A New Me… Hopefully!
Hi Kirst,
LMAO. I was wondering where you were going with that line. Made me chortle.
If you have a Wii before I do I’ll be totally jealous! OK, now let’s catch Rudolf. I’ll hold him, you shave!!