My day is turning into a wreck already.
I loaded up the car with all the kids for the school run, collected another child en route and then battled the traffic only to get to school to find out it was closed. The boiler has packed up. The two boys were delighted. I was not.
Picture: Brent and MariLynn
I also learnt that playgroup was closed because the building wasn’t warm enough, so my eldest daughter was annoyed. So was I.
So then I battled the traffic in the other direction.
Not a massive problem, because I’m home all day so I don’t have to let down an employer or miss a day’s pay.
But I feel miffed.
And I feel guilty for feeling miffed.
I feel agitated because I had plans to achieve things today. Plans that revolved around only having to look after one quiet child.
Instead, all I’m hearing is…
Dad
Dad
Dad
Dad
Really and truly I should be pleased to get more time with the kids, but having spent two weeks with them climbing the walls they desperately need the sort of structure that school gives. The sort of structure I’m not at all geared up to give them.
Which of course is something else to feel guilty about.
Today I desperately wanted to get stuck into tackling my financial situation, but it’s the sort of thing I need to concentrate on. The sort of thing that, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad prevents or at least makes extremely extremely frustrating and difficult.
After both of my boys misbehaved on Monday I told them they would have an entire week without TV. Little did I know they would be at home with me all day today.
I’m going to stick to my guns and deny them TV, but as a consequence I’ll be busy helping them read, write, colour and make.
The swine of it is, I love to do these things. Just not today.
I need to drop my bad attitude quickly or I’ll find myself snapping at the children – they don’t deserve that – and what’s more, I’ll be setting the worst example possible.
I hear a lot said about a Mother’s Guilt. Perhaps this is some of what I’m feeling today?
Do you use a feedreader? If so, you can follow my bad moods here. The updates are automatic and cost you nothing. Go on. You know you want to.
{ 14 comments }